My words....my WORDS....they are outta' control! I said something to my daughter in law to the effect, "take your clothes off....I'm in my underwear"....what I was 'trying' to say was....close your eyes....I'm in my underwear! Oy vey!
Every day....every hour....every minute....I screw up! If I'm trying to talk too fast....a word every two/three seconds....that's too fast! I try to be deliberate in terms of putting words together and making sense out of it. If I don't, people look at me, and just smile. They don't laugh at me....or cry....they just smile!
My hope, and prayer is....words will come back. Not as obvious to me....but to other people, friends, family, after time goes bye, they think I'm doing better.
I don't know that my speech pattern will ever go back to the pre-stroke words....probably better anyway! I talked way to fast before my stroke....and I wished that I could slow down....well....I took care of it!
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Wednesday, January 21, 2015
Literally Hangin' Out
February 2011 my bride and I were invited to a 'get together' with friends from my previous 'work' place. Probably only 15 to 20 people there....but my oh my....it was great to see and to listen people talk!
There were friends there that had been there 28 years before. Audrey, Cleo, Carol were so nice to see that night! Anita, Karl, Todd, Lori....close friends for many years....very touching. Lisa, Christine....over the top....just some of the most favorite friends of all time! We left western Wisconsin 10 years before....and I was really happy to be back!
Everybody 'tried' to talk with me....and I listened....but didn't talk back much. The words I would want to say....I couldn't begin to get it out of my mouth. I have learned to be a much better 'listener' than I've ever been before. And sometime....when I do try to say something....I REALLY screw it up!
Time goes on....and everyone knows that! But time....just escapes me.
"How did it get so late so soon?" - Dr. Seuss
There were friends there that had been there 28 years before. Audrey, Cleo, Carol were so nice to see that night! Anita, Karl, Todd, Lori....close friends for many years....very touching. Lisa, Christine....over the top....just some of the most favorite friends of all time! We left western Wisconsin 10 years before....and I was really happy to be back!
Everybody 'tried' to talk with me....and I listened....but didn't talk back much. The words I would want to say....I couldn't begin to get it out of my mouth. I have learned to be a much better 'listener' than I've ever been before. And sometime....when I do try to say something....I REALLY screw it up!
Time goes on....and everyone knows that! But time....just escapes me.
"How did it get so late so soon?" - Dr. Seuss
Monday, January 12, 2015
My Left Brain - Springtime 2011
There isn't a day that goes by when I ask why? My right leg, my right arm, the fuzzy feeling on the right side of my body. The right side of my head....top of my head (right side), my ear, my face, the right side of my neck....all fuzzy! My shoulder, my chest, my stomach, my hip, my gluteus maximus (right side)....always feel fuzzy. My nose, my lips, my eye....my eye....feels fuzzy all the time! And all because my left brain shut down. Mind you....I'm not complain' Lucy....just askin' why?
I can't carry on with a normal conversation. There are hundreds of words....nah....thousands....that just escape my brain....or at least my mouth! My brain....this is scary....but I see....see....the words! I don't how to use them. I mean, I know what I what to say, but there are little words.... the Articles - a, an, and the - are adjectives. Why can't I pull an adjective out?
Now I'm really getting excited about 'The Wedding'! August 13, 2011....a wedding! Scared....no....really petrified in terms of just putting words out of my mouth....but right now....excited! I have written everything out. I have highlighted different words, sentences and paragraph....in different colors. Yellow to be reflective (adjective....that's good, huh?), pink to be excited, purple to be funny....and green to pray, and orange to be serious. My speech therapist said I should read/say in front of her....mmmmm....I'll have to see about that!
I can't carry on with a normal conversation. There are hundreds of words....nah....thousands....that just escape my brain....or at least my mouth! My brain....this is scary....but I see....see....the words! I don't how to use them. I mean, I know what I what to say, but there are little words.... the Articles - a, an, and the - are adjectives. Why can't I pull an adjective out?
Now I'm really getting excited about 'The Wedding'! August 13, 2011....a wedding! Scared....no....really petrified in terms of just putting words out of my mouth....but right now....excited! I have written everything out. I have highlighted different words, sentences and paragraph....in different colors. Yellow to be reflective (adjective....that's good, huh?), pink to be excited, purple to be funny....and green to pray, and orange to be serious. My speech therapist said I should read/say in front of her....mmmmm....I'll have to see about that!
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
A Wedding
After I came home (the second time) from Rochester I had a beautiful young woman ask me to marry her.....and her beau! Man.....it was so cool to have someone ask me to marry them.....but how? I had to get my 'marryin' people together' kinda' guy license!
Back to the beautiful young woman. It was a very cold night in western Wisconsin.....and I didn't know it was going to happen! Before my wife and I left to go back home, she ask me if I would marry her and her beau. Well.....I started to say yes, but first, I started to cry! Again.....I'm a cry baby! I used to be a tough kinda' man.....but not anymore!
I went 'online' and discovered how I could get my 'marryin' people' degree! Well.....after doing everything that I needed to do.....I called the State of Wisconsin and they said....."$35 and fill out the form.....and they're married". That's it? I didn't have to take all the whatever I took.....online? They said "if you want to say you're a reverend.....you're a reverend"! Well.....I would have preferred a pastor.....or a priest.....but I thought that would be disingenuous.....reverend it is!
It took me a while to put everything into words.....as it does to this day! When I write..... I think it makes more sense than if someone were having a conversation with me. My mind works fast.....but my words are 'oh.....so.....slow'!
The wedding.....in August.....I can hardly wait!
Back to the beautiful young woman. It was a very cold night in western Wisconsin.....and I didn't know it was going to happen! Before my wife and I left to go back home, she ask me if I would marry her and her beau. Well.....I started to say yes, but first, I started to cry! Again.....I'm a cry baby! I used to be a tough kinda' man.....but not anymore!
I went 'online' and discovered how I could get my 'marryin' people' degree! Well.....after doing everything that I needed to do.....I called the State of Wisconsin and they said....."$35 and fill out the form.....and they're married". That's it? I didn't have to take all the whatever I took.....online? They said "if you want to say you're a reverend.....you're a reverend"! Well.....I would have preferred a pastor.....or a priest.....but I thought that would be disingenuous.....reverend it is!
It took me a while to put everything into words.....as it does to this day! When I write..... I think it makes more sense than if someone were having a conversation with me. My mind works fast.....but my words are 'oh.....so.....slow'!
The wedding.....in August.....I can hardly wait!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)